 Swaziland King Mswati III calls it the 'Reed Dance'. Which sounds nice, but you only get to dance if you're one of 14,000 virgins prepared to get your kit off for him.
And when you read that somewhere in Sydney, someone finds it perfectly rational to pay $36 for a bottle of Latvian water to complement their gravalax, you can't help but think the gaffer might have been onto something.
For most of us, life is just plain wacky enough as it is in its bog-standard, Man meets Woman, Man marries Woman, Children burst out of Woman and Start Running Things form.
You might, for instance, have decided that, having put the kids to bed early, you're going to do something mindnumbingly normal for once.
Trim your nails. Put some CDs back in their cases. Dust.
Only it was tuna casserole for dinner tonight and at 9pm, its normal passage through the intestinal tract of your 10-month old is halted by a corn kernel lodged sideways in his bum.
So instead of changing your shoelaces from crisscrosses to loops, you spend three hours on your knees chanting "bicycles, bicycles" and massaging tiny gluteus maximii.
All with the kind of dreaded anticipation usually reserved for celebrities on kids' TV shows that get off on dumping buckets of mucus on the heads of anyone who blinks with both eyes at once.
Weird, and if you think it's just a random oddity, you've never spent any more than three hours with a one-year-old.
But for some people, keeping a steady supply of Vaseline handy in case the spaniel gets its head stuck in the pool gate for the third time this week just doesn't float their kooky boats enough.
They've got a couple of grand that won't stop burning a hole in their pocket until it's spent on a slice of Princess Diana's wedding cake.
Or if they're blessed with royal blood in their veins, they're not happy until 14,000 virgins are parading bare-breasted before them.
Maybe the kindergarten next door is cranking up that Bob the Builder single again. Time to call the cops on the sadistic little freaks.
Skateboard outlaws, kangaroo abusers, women with wigs full of cocaine - they're all gathered here in Meeja's People Behaving Badly Special Feature.
Read it. Feel good about yourself again.
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Seniors not scared to rub wrinkles well into their 70s
Horny 70-something grannies are gagging for it, and their senior partners are up for the challenge of giving it othem more often, with a recent study showing more 70-year-olds are even having more orgasms than ever.
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One in 10 Australians 'racial supremacists'
Australia is a migrant nation, but one-in-10 citizens are "racial supremacists", says a 10-year study, with 46 per cent of New South Wales leading the pack, claiming some ethnic groups "did not belong".
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Vegas casinos give in to naked temptation
Traditionally kept separate, the two main vices of Las Vegas - sex and gambling - have finally come together following the introduction of an adults-only pool at the Rio Hotel and Casino.
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Hotel offers free drinks for patrons' panties
An Australian pub offering free drinks to women who remove their underwear and display it to patrons will be investigated by alcohol licencing regulators. Thoroughly investigated. On Sunday.
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German butcher admonished for naked woman advert
Germany's national advertising council
has admonished a butcher for putting on its adverts and delivery trucks pictures of a naked woman with the slogan "Meat
Products, Fresh Service" stamped across her body.
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Australia hunts cowardly kangaroo fighter
Australian animal welfare authorities have launched a nationwide hunt for a man filmed punching and kicking a kangaroo unconscious as his friend laughs while filming the one-sided bout.
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Guy that fed black slave to the lions
A white South African farmer who was sentenced to life imprisonment for feeding a black worker to a pack of lions has been released from jail on parole after serving just three years of his sentence.
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Bigfoot just a rubber gorilla suit
It's officially a hoax - researchers say the hairy heap claimed by two men to be the corpse of the mythical half-ape, half-human creature Bigfoot was actually a rubber gorilla costume.
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Neighbour busts up kinder party
A cranky New Zealander has bludgeoned a noise control officer into busting up a kindergarten party for pumping out Bob the Builder too loudly. Well, it was nearly 7pm...
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